Infibeam is a very reputed Company and it means its business.
As the ad explains, it ‘invites’ entrepreneurs to create their own online store so as to start selling their goods instantly.
This ‘platform’ enables store owners to get instantly ‘e-commerce’ enabled!
Now, amongst all the examples mentioned in this ad meant to inspire entrepreneurs like me to start an e-commerce venture (and catch the bus that we have all missed), the idea that I LOVED the most was the one that encourages me to start a BUFFALO STORE!!!!
Wowowowowo!!!
I HAVE NEVER EVER, EVER owned, sold, traded, hoarded, exchanged, escrowed, venture capitalized, angel funded, or exited a BUFFALO Business before!!!
This IS the time to start!!
So, this is my plan, and I want you to help me think through it:
– First, I assume that I will go to some places in ??? (hmmmmm…..where can I go around my house at Peddar Road and buy some buffalos?), acquire some of these fabulous animals, photograph them, and the SELL them online!!!
Shall we agree to call it the “Rodinhoods Buffalo Store”???
Next, when you visit my online Buffalo store, you will find:
– A RANGE of Buffalos! (ps – what else did you expect)?
– Listed in colours, sizes, quantities of milk that they supply, etc etc
– PS – I am a complete veg and a monk in the making, so none of my buffalos can be bought for eating.
– I will offer gifting options, BUT GIFT PACKING IS NOT POSSIBLE. Sorry. Maaf Karo bhai.
Now, when you buy a Buffalo, Infibeam has promised me all credit cards and other payment gateway integrations, so paying me will not be a problem.
PLEASE NOTE – CASH ON DELIVERY WILL NOT BE POSSIBLE.
I mean, if you live on the 19th floor of a skyscraper in Versova, then how can my delivery boy get the BUFFALO up to your house in the elevator and then deliver the buffalo to you and take money from you??
Given that there are 40-50% returns in Cash On Delivery e-commerce sales, and you find that the Buffalo you ordered is not exactly smelling the way you expected it to, then what can my Company do??
Also, goods once bought will not be taken back. It’s rather difficult to collect buffalos back, after they have been delivered.
Finally – I’m not gonna be spending much money on ‘marketing’ ‘coz I’m a Marwari and I don’t like to spend – I just like to earn money. So, if you can tell your friends, family, bosses, girlfriends and mother in laws to also buy a Buffalo from me, I am happy to discount your own Buffalo by 18%.
Please gimme feedback in case I have forgotten anything else!!!!!???
******
– Taking a deep breath and getting a bit more pensive, I ask – is THIS WHAT LEADING E-COMMERCE sites in India should be advertising and projecting???
– Is this what they get funded to do??